South Park Episodes in Real Media format

This blog will talk about and have links to South Park episodes and special segments, as well as the movie that came out in 1999. All of these will be in Real Media format.

Why in Real Media? Well, back in the day (1997) that's all we had that was decent. Small file sizes (35 to 40 MB each) that could be downloaded easily with a dial-up modem.

Even in 2010, the current season (Season 14) episodes are still being encoded in Real Media format.

But what if you don't like Real Player? Do you think it's evil? Well, try VLC instead. VLC Media Player is free, doesn't mess with your computer, and is available in Windows or Mac OS X. Heck, it's even available in Linux!

Click here to download VLC

So have fun and enjoy these. Share and share alike if you can!

S14EP07 - Crippled Summer (RM Format)

The drug addiction of Towelie, a living and talking towel, is growing so overwhelming that the South Park children make attempts to help him. Towelie's history is shown, starting with years of drug addiction to marijuana, crystal meth, heroin and crack cocaine. He previously had a girlfriend named Rebecca and conceived a child with her (a washcloth), but he was kicked out out their home due to his persistently getting high. His life continued in a downward spiral, leaving him in heavy debt and offering oral sex to strangers for money in the alleys. The boys help him get a job at Lake Tardicaca, a summer camp for mentally handicapped children, as a towel to dry off the campers. However, Towelie persists in drug use and fellating strangers in the supply closet, and is fired by the camp. The boys confront Towelie and make emotional speeches to him as a plea to help him from killing himself (except Cartman, who uses this opportunity to hurt Kyle and his Jewish faith on television, which the psychatrist stupidly allows to continue, clearly unaware that it has nothing to do with Towlie). He refuses their pleas until Butters reminds him of Towelie's child, which finally prompts him to accept the offer to go to a rehabilitation clinic in Southern California.

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Password: southparkrm

S14EP06 - “201” (RM Format)

It's a tense situation in South Park as Muhammad has become the pawn in the game to save the town. The Ginger kids are threatening to destroy the city if Stan and Kyle don't hand over the Prophet and the celebrities have met violence with violence by unleashing Mecha Streisand. In the midst of all of this, all anyone really wants to know is, who is Eric Cartman's father?

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Password: southparkrm

S14EP05 - “200” (RM Format)

While on a school field trip to a fudge factory, Stan accidentally insults Tom Cruise again by calling him a "fudge packer". Cruise then recruits 200 other celebrities that have been ridiculed by the town of South Park to bring a class action lawsuit against the town. After being called to the principal's office, Stan returns to the factory with his dad try to apologize and convince Cruise to drop the suit. An angry Cruise agrees to do so, only if they can help Cruise meet Muhammad. This causes an uproar, as the townsfolk fear that forcing Muhammed to appear in public will drive Muslim radicals to bomb the town. As Stan and Kyle go to the Super Best Friends for aid, it is revealed that Cruise and the other celebrities only want Muhammad for his "goo", which will make them immune to ridicule.

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Password: southparkrm

S14EP04 - You Have 0 Friends (RM Format)

Kyle, Cartman and Kenny surprise Stan by creating a Facebook account for him. Stan protests, saying he does not want to get "sucked into" Facebook. Cartman warns Stan that if he does not add any friends to his Facebook profile, he will end up like fellow student Kip, a Facebook member who has had his account for six months and has no Facebook friends. Kyle starts to pity Kip and adds him as a friend, much to the joy of Kip. Kip is shown to be shy and nerdy, and tells his parents about his new "friend". They are happy for him and allow him to spend time with Kyle, which for Kip means taking his computer to the movies and spending time on Kyle's Farmville farm. His parents are unaware that he is only chatting online, and think Kyle literally lives on a farm.

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Password: southparkrm

S14EP03 - Medicinal Fried Chicken (RM Format)

New state laws prohibiting fast food restaurants in low-income neighborhoods result in the closure of all KFC eateries in Colorado, much to the dismay of Cartman, who is addicted to the food. When Randy Marsh learns a former KFC outlet has become a medical cannabis dispensary, he attempts to give himself cancer to get a doctor's referral for marijuana. After placing his testicles into a microwave oven, Randy successfully gives himself testicular cancer, as well as testicles so large he has to use a wheelbarrow to carry them. Randy obtains his medical referral and starts smoking marijuana regularly. Meanwhile, his testicles continue to grow, to the point that he uses them as a space hopper for movement. Randy convinces his friends that women find larger testicles attractive, and they eventually give themselves testicular cancer as well. The local doctor, unaware of the men's self-irradiation, becomes convinced a recent change in South Park is responsible for the cancer outbreak.

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Password: southparkrm

S14EP02 - The Tale of Scrotie McBoogerballs (RM Format)

The students at South Park Elementary are assigned to read The Catcher in the Rye, and are excited to do so after learning about the controversy surrounding the book. Butters finishes reading the novel and immediately goes into a trance-like state and becomes convinced that he must kill John Lennon until his dad tells him that Lennon's already dead. However, Stan, Kyle, Cartman, and Kenny hate the novel, not finding it offensive and wondering why it was banned in public schools. They decide to write their own novel, entitled The Tale of Scrotie McBoogerballs after Kenny's suggestion, with the intention of making it the most profane and controversial book ever.

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Password: southparkrm

S14EP01 - Sexual Healing (RM Format)

The new edition of the Tiger Woods PGA Tour series of video games incorporates elements of the alleged physical altercations Woods had with his wife regarding his extramarital affairs, and resembles a fighting game more than a golf simulation. Cartman, Stan, and Kenny become big fans of the game. Meanwhile, scientists at the Center for Disease Control determine that sex addiction is a disease reaching epidemic proportions. They decide to screen schoolchildren for the disease, and Kenny, Kyle, and Butters are diagnosed as sex addicts. Kenny is killed after attempting autoerotic asphyxiation, while Kyle and Butters are sent to attend a therapy session for sex addicts consisting of Michael Douglas, Michael Jordan, Ben Roethlisberger, David Duchovny, Charlie Sheen, David Letterman, Bill Clinton, Billy Bob Thornton, Kobe Bryant, Elliot Spitzer, and Tiger Woods.

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Password: southparkrm